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kell View Drop Down
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    Posted: 22 August 2007 at 8:32pm
So here I am! I have struggled for 3 months now, telling myself it will pass....then worrying if I told anyone how I felt they would take my kids away.....or worse put me in a straight jacket.
Plunket came to day and I cracked, I have put on a brave "im fine" face for too long and I NEED help. She wouldnt leave until I had rung my doctor and made an appointment with him for tomorrow, I hope he doesnt think im nuts, im scared, wish me luck and I'll check back in with you tomorrow.

Thankyou for letting me get that out
Kayla Rose is now 4!
James Sydney is nearly 2!
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Edited by amy
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busymum View Drop Down
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Good on you Kell, it's horrible having that feeling of "needing to have it all together" and hopefully chatting with your doctor (and anything subsequent) will really help you out. You're very brave, don't be scared about tomorrow, you're doing it for you and your family!
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kell View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kell Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 August 2007 at 9:25pm
Thankyou, Im just so scared to really admit anything is wrong, I feel like once its out and the doc knows then its real, crazy how our brains work.
I cannot go on with these feelings, its not fair on me or my poor family. But hell I havent told anyone the full extent of what I really feel, I told plunket about 1/2 of it and she thought that was bad
Kayla Rose is now 4!
James Sydney is nearly 2!
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my2angels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote my2angels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 August 2007 at 9:35pm
good on you for talking about it at all even if you havent shared it all. I didnt want to tell anyone about it because I didnt want anyone to know/think i couldnt handle it and thought that if others can why cant i. Plus i didnt want hubby to think he had a nutty wife but to be honest even just going to my doctor and admitting i wasnt doing to well felt great. I walked out of there and felt like a weight had been lifted and i finally had a plan.
Good luck tomorrow
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kell View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kell Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 August 2007 at 10:01pm
Thankyou, if you dont mind me asking, what was your plan? what did the doctor do for you?
Kayla Rose is now 4!
James Sydney is nearly 2!
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my2angels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote my2angels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 6:59am
It was more that I knew I had support and wasnt just floundering along if that makes sense. She put me on happy pills and we made an appt for follow up so I knew that if things didnt improve I didnt have to make that step to get help again, it was already planned. Plus we disected what was happening in my life and talked about how I can improve it and where I can lessen the stress. Also a lot of my issues are to do with anxiety so she referred me back to the anxiety disorder clinic. I think getting a good doctor is key, my doctor is great, even if I moved the other side of town I would not change doctors.
And remember your not the only one who is going through this, I dont say that to make it sounds like its not a big deal but so you know that your not crazy, and that people get through this and out the other side, and there are a heap of ladies on here that can vouch for that.
Good luck today.
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kell View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kell Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 7:50am
Thankyou for the insight, I too have had anxiety and panic attacks for years, but again ive not told a doctor. It wasnt until mum said she had been put on pills for anxiety that I asked her how she felt, everything she listed I thought was "normal" I thought everyone wanted to throw up at the thought of having to leave the house, and locking yourself in the house was what safe people do!

I better mention everything to the doc ha?
Im so scared, be back later
Kayla Rose is now 4!
James Sydney is nearly 2!
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my2angels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote my2angels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 8:58am
Yep tell the doctor everything.
They describe an irational fear or anxiety as something that effects your life. I thought a lot of my stuff was normal and figured if ive lived with it this long then why change things but when i left a great job because i couldnt do the lift (19th floor so to far to walk up stairs) I realised that maybe it wasnt normal. still took me another 5 years to get to the doctor and that was only because i had the whole PND aswell and it was either that or divorce.
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Kellz View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kellz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 9:22am
Good on you for realising you need help, and taking the first step. I know its a really scarey thing to do.
I constantly asured myself that all my feelings were just the way I was/ because I was sleep deprived/ stressed etc,...it wasnt til things with Isla settled down a bit and I had time to think about how I was feeling that I realised that I really had to get some help, for me and my family. I was pretified of needing to go on meds, and being labled as having depression.
I felt the huge relief after just talking to my Dr too. He referred me for counselling, and Im on meds too.

Good luck for today. You are doing the right thing. There is support out there, but they cant find you if you hide away!
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mum2paris View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mum2paris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 12:39pm
Kell i was the same, I had heaps of anxiety attacks for years at the thought of even having to speak to people i didn't know (ha, which i now have to do every single day.. silly profession for a shy person to choose), and even more after having paris over every single thing, even just walking through town by myself with her would bring one on. I was sure if i told mike the full extent of things he'd pack up and take Paris with him. For you to have a history of that sorta thing, then to go through what you went through with having James it hasn't been any way of an easy ride for you lately, well done for admitting and getting help, it just seems to get a little less hard to function once you've gotten it out there. Hugs.
Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja

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kell View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kell Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 1:40pm
Thanks Ladies ((((((hug))))))
The doctor was great, shocked, but great. He called in another lady who is a counsellor there to have a little chat too.
They have put me on Citalopram and ativan, and have referred me to the maternal mental health people.
I think having James was just the Icing on the cake so to speak, I lost a baby last year and didnt know it had died till my scan, I was by myself and ended up at the hospital I sat there for 12 hours and had started bleeding and cramping in the friken waiting area! Long story but it was traumatic, then Si had his accident and i had to nurse him for 3 months as he couldnt shower himself or eat, then we moved to Palmy and Si had to stay in Aucks........I had alot of hospital admissions while pregnant and was super sick doing it alone with a 2 year old, then james's birth etc.

So I have alot to work through but even more to be thankful for

Mum2Paris I was trying so hard to not cry when I saw you today at the doctors, sorry I didnt say much.

Edited by kell
Kayla Rose is now 4!
James Sydney is nearly 2!
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Kellz View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kellz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 3:37pm
Good on you for going to the Dr. Glad they were able t help, and got a counselling to see oyu. Hope it doesnt take long to get in to see the maternal health team,..see if they will visit you at home,..mine does cos I said it was stressful to get to town around baby sleep times etc.
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mummy_becks View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummy_becks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 4:18pm
Kell def get them to come to you. But as you said admitting is the first step and it is always the hardest step.
I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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miss View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote miss Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 5:30pm
Kell, how awesome that you have been able to open up and talk to someone, getting yourself the help we need. You are amazing, you have been through so much it is no wonder that now you need some help! Remember, even the strongest tree can be felled if enough is thrown at it, and it is so much better if you can stop the axe from hitting!

Big hugs to you - but you are already on the road to feeling better! (A long road it may be, but you have taked that first step)
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mum2paris View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mum2paris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 23 August 2007 at 7:37pm
If i had known i would have come and talked a bit more.. i just stayed away cos i didn't want you guys to get our dreaded lurgies... lol.. till paris goes "hey, that's a lady from mcdonalds", and just came up to talk to you.

Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja

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kell View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kell Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 August 2007 at 9:14am
Thankyou everyone, it means so much to have people that will stand behind me when the going gets tough, I just have to remember to not keep it all to myself.

Paris is the cutest
Kayla Rose is now 4!
James Sydney is nearly 2!
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nictoddie View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote nictoddie Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 August 2007 at 1:54pm
aww kell big hugs to you hun, hey if you ever want to hang out for a coffee give me a yell, just pm me and we could meet up, We are moving in a couple of weeks to Tokomaru, well in between tok and Linton.
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