Biting HELP (and OUCH)
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Forum Name: Toddler Times
Forum Description: Is bubs growing up and getting into everything? How do you train them to use the potty? When do you start feeding solids? Share your tips and advice here!
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Topic: Biting HELP (and OUCH)
Posted By: Neeks
Subject: Biting HELP (and OUCH)
Date Posted: 13 November 2008 at 5:34pm
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OMG, just lately Keziah has started biting us anywhere she can find a bare piece of flesh so my question for you all is thus:
What can we do when she bites us???? Do we bite her back or pretend to cry (sometimes it's not pretend either, cause it bloody hurts) Suggestions please -------------  
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Replies:
Posted By: tamiem
Date Posted: 13 November 2008 at 5:41pm
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We had this problem with my nephew, and when he went to bite us we'd just hold a wipe up and he'd get a mouthful of that instead! It didn't take long to stop him, I guess because he hated the taste!
Not sure that this method was very PC but oh well! ------------- The Sale Fairy is a weekly email newsletter, advertising online sales & specials for baby, children’s and maternity products. www.thesalefairy.co.nz info@thesalefairy.co.nz |
Posted By: Bel
Date Posted: 13 November 2008 at 5:50pm
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Luke bites me sometimes, I think it is to get attention and I now tell him off in a big strong voice. OUCH! DO NOT BITE MUMMY! and then move him away from me. He now cries when I do this so I know something is getting through. I felt bad the first time, but it does hurt and gives me a fright - the cross voice is not a put on voice...
I guess you need to work out your way of saying NO and stick with it. I am fairly sure that biting back doesn't work - all she gets from that is that it is OK for you to bite but not her?? ------------- Mum to two beautiful kids 
Luke (09.11.2007) Amy (01.04.2009) |
Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 13 November 2008 at 8:44pm
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Yeah I wouldn't bite back, not exactly teaching them the right message.
You can try just putting her somewhere and walking off/ignoring her so she gets no attention for it, along with saying "NO we do not bite that hurts" (or something similar). If that doesn't work, it didn't with Spencer he would just happily sit and play and couldn't care less that I was ignoring him, then you could start time out. I started around the same age for Spencer and it was for biting. It takes a lot of perserverance and they will push it and push it but it does work. I rarely get bit now and no is now enough without needing timeout for him to stop. He was also munching on our coffee table and would get timed out for that. If you want to do that then pick a spot for her to go, needs to be away from anything they can play with. i.e don't put too close to curtains etc. The first bit will be less about punishing what they just did and more about teaching them to stay in the spot for the minute. Just stay calm and everytime she gets up calmly put her back and tell her she needs to stay there. (had to do this a good 30-40 times with Spencer) once she stays for even 20 secs then get down explain why she was there (they understand tone and it gets you use to explaining punishments) then have a cuddle as they say sorry part. Each time she gets put in timeout up the time she has to stay there until you are at the minute. Just one other little warning once timeout was working for us, as in he would sit there for the minute very upset and then cuddle afterwards, he then decided to just go back and bite the coffee table straight away. One afternoon he was in and out of timeout for an hour before he stopped it, I figure he was seeing if I would just give up and when he realised I wasn't he stopped. Sorry for the novel and good luck  ------------- 
 
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Posted By: Neeks
Date Posted: 13 November 2008 at 10:46pm
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Awesome, thanks ladies We're using the stern voice routine at the moment (NO, do NOT bite mummy/daddy etc, it hurts!!) as I think it will be hard to keep her in one place for too long..
It doesn't help that the kids (mainly the 9 year old) think it's funny to let her do it to them even when we tell him off for teaching her bad habits...  -------------
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Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 14 November 2008 at 7:33am
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Yep we did what Bel said. MIL is forever telling us to bite/pinch/pull hair back when Isla does something to us. We dont think thats teaching her anything, other than if its ok for mummy and daddy to do then I can too.
The seperateing her from us after telling her its not acceptable in a stern voice, and not giving her the attention she wants definatly works for us. |
Posted By: jaycee
Date Posted: 14 November 2008 at 9:57am
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Amy went through a stage of this too - it really bothered me as a child that bites is seen as being really *bad* and it is seen as being so much worse than other bad behaviour (eg hitting/pushing/hair pulling). Luckily she only seemed to do it to me and on the odd time to DH and my mum.
I used time out and put her in the most boring place I could find. I kept the port-a-cot set up in the guest room (no toys there) and a soon as she did it it was 'no - do NOT bite mummy, that is very naughty' and off to the time out of 1 minute. Took a few weeks but it did work. Good luck with Keziah - I am sure you will get it sorted soon  .-------------   
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Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 14 November 2008 at 11:10am
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We went through this too and it seems to have stopped.....although I can still see the open jaws coming sometimes and get in fast and pull him away with a "NO!!! Do NOT bite mummy!!!" and then put him down. I havent tried time out as I dont think he's get it just yet...and I'm too much of a softy.
I dont know why he stopped.....I think he discovered tantrums and moved on to a new stage....thankfully that has gone too so we have a happy boy for now. It could also be teething.
I posted about it and I will see if I can dig it up
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Posted By: Neeks
Date Posted: 16 November 2008 at 10:49pm
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Glad to know I'm not the only one who thinks this way...
I haven't had to take drastic measures yet as saying "No, do NOT bite" seems to be working thus far, but if it gets out of control i'll give it a go.. and see how we get on Thanks Jess -------------
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Posted By: DJ
Date Posted: 19 November 2008 at 11:11am
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I've been doing the same as Bel.
Yesterday I tried the fake crying and she fake cried too..... so we won't be trying that again! It will be important to get the whole family doing the same thing. I didn't realise that DP had been letting A bite him and pull his hair and making a game of it  , so I had to explain to him that it wasn't socially acceptable behaviour..... Who would have thought that needed an explanation! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: DJ
Date Posted: 19 November 2008 at 11:12am
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deleted - double post ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Bel
Date Posted: 19 November 2008 at 4:48pm
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Haha DJ, DHs sometimes don't get that whole "socially acceptable" thing... My DH is still the same with Luke hitting him - I tell him that I want him to say no and then will find them playing at it again later
But for some reason L doesn't bite DH - only me... ------------- Mum to two beautiful kids
Luke (09.11.2007) Amy (01.04.2009) |
Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 19 November 2008 at 6:39pm
My DH thought I was being mean when I put him in timeout for biting because he was teething Men, they are worse than the toddlers sometimes. Imagine if he bit someone elses kid and I just said "sorry he's teething" -------------
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